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GATES OF HEAVEN

Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day.
Apparently it had been a pretty busy day. So Peter (angel)
had to tell the first man, "Heavens getting pretty close to
full today and I've been asked to admit only people who have
had particularly horrible deaths.  So what's your story?" 
So the first man replies: "Well, for a while I suspected my
wife has been cheating on me, so today I came home early to
try to catch her red-handed.  As I came into my 25th floor
apartment, I could tell something was wrong, but all my
searching around didn't reveal where this other guy could
have been hiding.  Finally, I went out to the balcony, there
was this man hanging off of the balcony railing, 25 floors
above the ground!  By now I was really mad, so I started
beating on him and kicking him, but wouldn't you know it, he
wouldn't fall off. So finally I went back into my apartment
and got a hammer and started hammering on his fingers.  Of
course, he couldn't stand that for long, so he let go and
fell -- but even after 25 stories, he fell into the bushes,
stunned but okay.  I couldn't stand it anymore, so I ran
into the kitchen, grabbed the fridge and threw it over the
edge where it landed on him, killing him instantly.  But all
the stress and anger got to me, and I had a heart attack and
died there on the balcony."  "That sounds like a pretty bad
day to me," said Peter, and let the first man into heaven.

The second man comes up and Peter explains to him about
heaven being full and again asks for his story. "It's been a
very strange day.  You see, I live on the 26th floor of my
apartment building, and every morning I do my exercises out
on my balcony.  Well, this morning I must of slipped or
something, because I fell over the railing of the balcony on
the floor below me.  I knew I couldn't hang on for very
long, when suddenly a man burst out onto the balcony.  I
thought for sure I was saved, when he started bating on me
and kicking me.  I held on the best I could until he ran
into the apartment and grabbed a hammer and started pounding
on my hands.  Finally I just let go, but again I was lucky
and fell into the bushes below, stunned but all right.  Just
when I was thinking I was going to be okay, this
refrigerator comes falling out of the sky and crushes me
instantly, and now I'm here."  Once again, Peter had to
conclude that sounded like a pretty horrible death,
therefore letting the second man into heaven also.

The third man came to the front of the line, and again the
whole process was repeated.  Peter explained that heaven was
full and asked the man for his story.  "Picture this," says
the third man, "I'm hiding naked inside this refrigerator
and ..."


by fabi

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